Heartset Coaching by Elle Butler
What does heartset mean to you?
17 years old; final year of secondary school; doing well academically. Early one morning, I discovered my father peering into the sugar-bowl. Starting to wish him good morning, I was quickly “shushed”.
He pointed at the dark specs in the white crystals, mouthing, “They’re listening.”
“What?” I asked.
Again, I was “shushed”. He pointed more urgently, whispering anxiously, “They’re listening. They’re tiny microphones.”
Now, I knew they were coffee crystals, but, as Dad was prone to severe rages, I thought better of telling him. I could see he was serious.
A middle-income family, living in regional Australia, both parents were non-descript government workers – teacher and clerk – doing their best to provide for their family – nothing anyone would want to spy on.
I knew something wasn’t right, but wanted Dad to feel safe and loved.
Although I didn’t realise it then, my heartset was beginning to develop. I wanted to do the best possible for everyone, everywhere.
How does heartset make mindset easier?
Heartset to Mindset
Growing up, I wasn’t generally encouraged to develop my mindset through affirmations or meditation. There was just a:
go to uni,
get a good job and
repeat the cycle
Mentality in my family:
It wasn’t until much, much later, when I-stumbled into entrepreneurship, that I explored these tools.
Yet somehow, I still had a deep desire to help whoever I could – I would befriend the kid sitting alone; offer to show the new kid around.
At home my family and I were subjected to physical and emotional abuse from Dad. Other times he showed a deep, bottomless love for me. I loved him, so I wanted to make him happy and do the best for him.
That morning, peering closely at the sugar bowl, I just wanted to do whatever I could to help this broken, worried man in front of me. This strong heartset laid the foundation for a positive mindset in the future.
How can people practice heartset?
Acting with Heartset:
When Mum woke to hear about the sugar-bowl, coffee grounds and mini-microphones, they went off for an “adult” conversation.
Mum convinced Dad to take a trip to our doctor, after dropping me at school, to discuss his reactions.
Not knowing whether anyone would be able to collect me after school, she pressed 50c into my hand to call a taxi to get home (No mobile phones back then!) My heart immediately wanted to help them. I whispered that I’d let the doctor’s surgery know they were on their way.
When they arrived, they were ushered straight to a consult room. Being almost unheard of, Dad’s suspicions were raised once more. It was a scary, confusing time.
My dad was committed to hospital because of my phone call – A really hard decision to make – but in my heart, I knew it was right.
Taking appropriate action for the right reasons – the heartset reasons, makes it easier to face yourself in the mirror each day.
What is the key to a limitless mindset?
Limitless Heartset; Limitless Mindset:
I was often told I’m a lot like Dad. This was good and not so good, given his actions and medical history!
I discovered that I could work to be a better version of myself.
The past doesn’t equal the present, and definitely doesn’t dictate the future.
As a former teacher, salesperson and current professional copywriter running an international digital marketing agency, human psychology has always fascinated me. Throughout my career, it is the reasoning behind my actions, providing insights and instigating positive change.
Developing heartset and mindset has no beginning nor end. There’s no right nor wrong. Actions, thoughts and beliefs are the culmination of life experiences. Life experiences mould your future actions, thoughts and beliefs.
People have different opinions. Neither are wrong; simply they have travelled different paths, experienced different journeys, reaching this point at this time.
Do not hold on to past thoughts; allow yourself to adapt with new realisations; your ability to develop your heartset and mindset becomes stronger and limitless.
Read more of this journey at: